His Grace

Chapter 1 - The Ministry of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson

 

"In all of this, however, I must acknowledge, as Peter learned, that it's not all up to me.  (I am doing a jig after reading these words!!!!)  The Author of grace will himself draw my children to Him, even as He did Peter, as I rest in His ability to work through the life of my family.  Perfection is not a standard He requires of me as a mother, for His grace extends to me as well as to my children.  My heartfelt trust in Him will be the fuel that energizes my days as I see Him draw my children through this gift (grace) that will serve them their whole lives." (pg. 29)

 

God's grace is something that is so hard for me to remember most days because it seems I am in constant motion, going from one chore/school subject/meal/mess to clean up/disagreement to referee after another.  There are days, like today, when I get to the end, and I feel as if I am failing.  The three older kids are all at that wonderful age when they want to exert their "knowledge," and this one-upmanship leads to many wars of words between them.  It wears me out and I get to the point where I feel as if *I* will never be able to teach them to live in peace.  ;-)

 

So tonight after putting the kids in bed, I only wanted to sit and stare, but ended up picking up this book instead and reading this wonderful news of God's grace!  I guess it all goes back to prayer, prayer and more prayer (how many times have I had to be reminded of that????), and I absolutely feel more light after being reminded of God's All-Powerful Hand that is involved in our lives.  :-)  Reminds me of Isaiah 40:11.

 

He tends His flock like a shepherd:

He gathers the lambs in His arms

and carries them close to His heart;

He gently leads those that have young.

Baby's Breath

 

Next time you have a baby in your hands, hold him up to your ear and listen to him breathe.  It will melt away all the stresses of the day and remind you of your rich blessings.

Sinners in the Hands of an Angry Mom

I was listening to our local Christian station the other night as I drove home from the grocery store.  For the life of me, I can't remember who was speaking, but I heard something that I have been carrying around with me since that night.  The speaker said that when Jonathan Edwards delivered his sermon, Sinners in the Hands of An Angry God, he did it without the pastoral theatrics that we have sometimes been exposed to. 

 

I think I read this sermon back in college.  You can imagine that I don't remember much about it.  I doubt I was interested in what was in front of me at the time, so I got on the web to read the sermon again, and I have to say that if there were any sermon that was set-up to be delivered by a yeller/pacer, then this one is it.  Just the title of the message alone would give anyone plenty of material for theatrics!  Read this exerpt in your finest T.V. evangelist voice:

 

"The bow of God's wrath is bent, and the arrow made ready on the string, and justice bends the arrow at your heart, and strains the bow, and it is nothing but the mere pleasure of God, and that of an angry God, without any promise or obligation at all, that keeps the arrow one moment from being made drunk with your blood. Thus all you that never passed under a great change of heart, by the mighty power of the Spirit of God upon your souls; all you that were never born again, and made new creatures, and raised from being dead in sin, to a state of new, and before altogether unexperienced light and life, are in the hands of an angry God."

 

Now that's some heavy stuff!  There's a lot more where that came from.

 

This sermon was a huge influence in the Great Awakening in the early 1700's, and it was all done without any yelling and screaming. 

 

So what has been at the back of my mind these last few days is this: if Jonathan Edwards can deliver this sermon without theatrics and loud voice, and have the members of his congregation begging God for forgiveness, what's to stop me from speaking to my own kids without theatrics (you know what I mean!) and receiving the same results?  Why can't I be a parent who never raises my voice to my children and yet gets immediate results when I speak?  I really don't see why I can't.  Here are my reasons why:

1) I'll bet a TON of prayer went into this sermon before it was written, while it was written, after it was written, before it was delivered, during its delivery and after its delivery. 

I'll bet if I increase my prayer life in this area of childrearing, I won't be able to NOT see results.

2) To be more specific about Jonathan Edwards' prayers about this sermon, I'll bet he prayed for God to speak to the hearts of his congregation.  I'll bet he prayed for God to SAVE his congregation. 

Am I always asking God for these things for my children?  No.  Just every now and then.  I'll bet I could change that!

3) The Word of God is active!  Jonathan Edwards used God's Word, the Bible, to reach his congregation. 

I pull out my Bible every now and then with the kids when there are behavior issues, but not nearly enough.  God's Word can take the place of my theatrics and do a much better job than I ever could.

 

So now I just need to pray for myself.  Pray that God would set my soul on fire for discipling my children without raising my voice, and feeling justified in doing so.

 

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

1 Corinthians 13:1-8

 

 

Top Ten Goals

With my last order from Sonlight they sent a little package of bookmarks that I appreciate.  There are ten, and on each one is a goal for homeschooling.  Well, I think that these can be applied to more than just homeschooling parents.  Here they are, in true David Letterman fashion, starting with #10:

 

10.  Raise culturally literate students.

       1 Chronicles 12:32 "Understand the times and know what to do about them."

9.  Create a love for quality literature - books that cause students to think deeply,

     feel passionately, and prepare themselves for action.

    Philippians 4:8 "Dwell on whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable..."

8.  Inspire students by example, to do thorough, competent research...to fulfill the   

     work of true scholars.

     Colossians 3:17, 23 "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as

     working for the Lord."

7.  Teach students through experience, that God is faithful; they can listen to other

     perspectives without falling into sin or having their faith destroyed.

     1 John 4:4 "Overcome...because the one who is in you is greater."

6.  Teach students not only biblical content, but how to listen as well - to understand

     first and judge second.

     James 1:19 "Be quick to listen, slow to speak."

5.  Train children to become engaging and effective ambassadors for Christ.

     2 Corinthians 5:20 "As though God were making His appeal through us."

4.  Inspire students to honor Christ boldly - in speech and conduct.

     Luke 12: 8-9 "Whover publich acknowledges me, I will also acknowledge

     before the angels."

3.  Encourage children to honor God's "Great Commission" by acquiring an

     international perspective and a godly heart for the world.

     Matthew 28:18-20 "Make disciples of all nations."

2.  Create a learner's heart, enthusiasm and excitement for learning - a desire to

     discover.

     Proverbs 3:13-15 "Wisdom is more profitable than silver and yields better

     returns than gold."

1.  Teach students to seek God's Kingdom above and beyond everything else.

     Matthew 6:33 "Seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness."

 

There is a little more said about these goals on the Sonlight site here. 

 

Another great resource for goal-setting for our kids is Ten Things to Do with Your Child Before Age Ten by Harvie and Laurie Bluedorn.  And even if your kids are past the age of ten, it's never too late to go back and try to correct a few things.  ;-)

Change Your Mind

Darin and I started homeschooling our kids seven years ago.  After homeschooling for about a year, I came across Charlotte Mason and Teaching the Trivium.  I love both of the approaches these two methods take.  There are many out there who claim to be CM/TTT in their teaching style.  I haven't necessarily been able to claim that I am one to exclusively follow these methods as I wanted because life was so busy which made it difficult to be able to really sit down and think hard about how I wanted to fully implement these methods into our school.  I have followed these methods as much as I can without being deeply intimate with them. 

 

For example, we have always done copywork, dictation and a bit of narration.  We went more quickly with math than TTT recommends, but slower than is normally recommended - if that makes any sense!  Ben and I studied a bit of Greek when he was in second grade.  We have labored hard to keep their character and Bible studies under the "most important" category.  We try to read aloud almost two hours per day, and finally, introduced our oldest to the study of Logic when he was 10 (now 11) using Building Thinking Skills.

 

With that said, there are so MANY areas that I have really wanted to improve upon.  Nature walks for one.  This has a tendency to perplex me.  I have a hard time viewing a Dallas suburb as a gateway to nature.  I realize I have to get over this one, as well as invest in a couple of good nature guides.  ;-)

 

Delayed math.  Like I said, with Ben, we went more slowly, then with Lydia, we didn't do much until she hit the last part of second grade.  Now we are using Horizons Math with them both.  Jack is in first grade and I thought, "Finally,  will get a chance to do this delayed math thing!"  I was teaching him without a curriculum.  He learned how to count by 10's, 5's, and 2's, we have been having conversations here and there about money, and we have been working on his addition math facts.  But he sees Ben and Lydia with their own math worksheets and wants that too!  So this weekend I broke down and bought him the first grade Horizons Math workbook.  He has already gone through it and done all of the money counting exercises. 

 

But what I wanted to write about was how for so long I didn't feel as if I would ever truly be able to incorporate all these wonderful CM/TTT ideas into our school, and had almost given up doing more than we already were doing, when I came across Karen Andreola's "Pocket Full of Pinecones" last January.  It was marked 75% of at Mardel, and I wasn't about to walk past a book marked 75% off.  I bought it, started reading it, and felt my brain starting to take a turn!  After finishing reading it, I moved on to "Handbook of Nature Study" I stalled out here with Nature Studies because it was summer and way too hot to be tramping around outside.  Now it is finally fall, and we have taken a few short walks to observe the world around us.  It was nice!  I have joined a CMyahoogroup and a TTT yahoogroup.  Both of these groups are reading material that supports each method and I can finally feel the breakthrough coming that I've always wanted.

 

DISCLAIMER: The following statement is going to sound SO LAME.  I mean, this is probably something you probably already knew, and I probably already knew, but to experience it that way I have has been eye-opening!

 

Okay.  So what I have discovered is that I cannot read CM books and TTT just ONCE and be ready to jump in with both feet.  I have to continually educate myself in these methods to truly be successful in teaching the way these two methods recommend.  I've accepted the fact that for the rest of my homeschooling career, I will have to constantly be reading something about CM and TTT methods, or I will eventually "lose it."  Reminds me of being a Christian!  Without reading my Bible I will eventually lose my "salt and light" and be worthless.  And to think, that it took me seven years of homeschooling to figure this one out.  Oyve!  ;-)  I'm so excited, thinking about the fact that Henry is only six-months-old!  Fresh material!!!!  LoL

Teaching the Trivium

Darin and I are kinda-sorta reading through Teaching the Trivium with an online yahoogroup.  We are in chapter three, the rest of the group is on chapter seven????  Something like that.  :-) 

 

Anyway, I love some of the quotes that are in this chapter.  They were very prophetic as you'll see.

 

"I am sure as I am of Christ's reign, that a comprehensive and centralized system of national education, separated from religion, as is now commonly proposed, will prove the most appalling enginery for the propagation of anti-Chrisitan and atheistic unbelif, and of antisocial nihilistic ethics, individual, social, and political, which this sin rent world has ever seen."

A.A. Hodge, Princeton Theologian, circa 1869

 

Here are a few from the "other" side.

 

"Education is thus a most powerful ally of Humanism, and every American public school is a school of Humanism.  What can the theistic Sunday schools, meeting for an hour a week and teaching only a fraction of the children, do to stem the tide of a five-day program of humanistic teaching?"

Charles F. Potter in the Humanist magazine, 1930

 

"I am convinced that the battle for humankind's future must be waged and won in the public school classroom by teachers who correctly perceive their role as the proselytizers of a new faith: a religion of humanity....The teacher must embody the same selfless dedication as the most rabid fundamentalist preachers, for they will be ministers of another sort, utilizing a classroom instead of a pulpit....The classroom must and will become an arena of conflict between the old and the new - the rotting corpse of Christianity, together with all its adjacent evils and misery, and the new faith of humanism."

John Dunphy in the Humanist magazine, Jan/Feb 1983

Elisabeth Elliot

I love Elisabeth Elliot.  I receive her daily devotional from Back to the Bible.  You can go here to subscribe to it, and others if you are interested.  Here is today's devotional.  It was encouraging to me because I do try to keep after the kids about little things, but sometimes I feel like such a nag!  ;-)

 

Author: Elisabeth Elliot
Source: Keep A Quiet Heart
Scripture: Luke 16:10-12 

Shop for Elisabeth Elliot Resouces

Little Things

When we were growing up our parents taught us, by both word and example, to pay attention to little things. If you do a thing at all, do it thoroughly: make the sheets really smooth on the bed, sweep all the comers and move all the chairs when you sweep the kitchen, roll the toothpaste tube neatly and put the cap back on, clean the hair out of your brush each time you use it, hang your towel straight on the rod, fold your napkin and put it into the silver ring before you leave the table, never wet your finger when you turn pages. They kept promises made to us as faithfully as they kept those made to adults. They taught us to do the same.

You didn't accept an invitation to a party and then not turn up, or agree to help with the Vacation Bible School and back out because a more interesting activity presented itself. The only financial debt my parents ever incurred was a mortgage on a house, which my father explained was in a special class because it was real estate which would always have value.

When I went to boarding school the same principles I had been taught at home were emphasized. There was a hallway with small oriental rugs which we called "Character Hall" because the headmistress, Mrs. DuBose, could look down that hall from the armchair where she sat in the lobby and spot any student who kicked up the comer of a rug and did not replace it. She would call out to correct him, "It's those tiny little things in your life which will crack you up when you get out of this school!" In the little things our character was revealed. Our response would make or break us. "Don't go around with a Bible under your arm if you didn't sweep under the bed," she said, for she would have no pious talk coming out of a messy room.

"Great thoughts go best with common duties. Whatever therefore may be your office regard it as a fragment in an immeasurable ministry of love" (Bishop Brooke Foss Westcott, b. 1825).

It is not easy to find children or adults who are dependable, careful, thorough, and faithful. So many lives seem honeycombed with small failures, neglectful of the little things that make the difference between order and chaos. Perhaps it is because they are so seldom taught that visible things are signs of an invisible reality; that common duties may be "an immeasurable ministry of love." The spiritual training of souls must be inseparable from practical disciplines, as Jesus so plainly taught; "The man who can be trusted in little things can be trusted in great; the man who is dishonest in little things will be dishonest in great. If then you cannot be trusted with money, that tainted thing, who will trust you with genuine riches! And if you cannot be trusted with what is not yours, who will give you what is your very own?" (Luke 16:10-12, JB). (The footnote to "your very own" says, "Jesus is speaking of the most intimate Possessions a man can have; these are spiritual.")

 

 

But....Why Can't I.....I Don't Want To!

Our kids are very argumentative with Darin and me.  There is a lot of "but I....", "first I need to.....", "why?" and "I don't want to" stuff coming back at us at a rate that is much higher and out of control than it needs to be!  Well, ANY of that is too much.  :-)  I think part of the problem here is that Darin and I have ANSWERED their protests.  We have been encouraging their unneccesary conversation by arguing back WITH them.  Darin and I talked about it last night, and we both realized that we get sucked into this sort of response without even noticing.  We are praying about being more diligent in this area, rather than just going with the flow of conversation.  We cannot allow the kids to rule in this area!

 

Most painful for me is the realization that *I* argue back with Darin on many occasions.  Growing up, I was one of those "WHY??????" kids.  I always had to know why, or I wanted my parents to understand what *I* thought, and so many times kept presenting my view past the time I was allowed.  I'm afraid that I have contributed to our problem with the kids right now.  A very humbling thought.  But I realize that this has transferred over to my adult life, and I can hear myself saying, "But why can't we do this because we need such-and-such?"  Darin will respond with a perfectly sane reason for why not, and I continue to push my own idea because I think my idea is also perfectly sane.  Well, it may be a perfectly good idea, but if Darin does not think so, then that should be the end of the conversation from me!  I should not be pushing it!  And I wonder how many times the kids have heard me push things with Darin like that.  :-/  I can't even begin to imagine.  I am mortified.

 

God spoke to me about this yesterday as I was reading an article by Reb Bradley.  It is titled Blind Spots of the Submissive Wife.  So today I have been prayerfully keeping my mouth shut.  All those years of "just presenting another side to the argument" is a weight on my back that I am dying to get rid of, but I have allowed this to become such an ingrained habit. This one will be painful to break. 

 

Just last night I wrote this verse into Ben's album, and I think I need to remind myself of it every day as I seek to root out this habit that hurts our family: "And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart."  Galatians 6:9.