Our Ways and His Ways

I was recently listening to a radio program where a father was discussing the suicide of his son.  I can't imagine the pain that the death of this man's son brought.  I NEVER want to go through that.  What struck me as I was listening, was that everyone on the show kept repeating that the son had been such an intelligent boy.  He could have been anything.  Why did he kill himself?

I think it's a big mistake to 1) tell our kids they can be ANYTHING they want to be and 2) that they are so smart and can achieve or overcome anything in life because of that.

1) We all have limits to our capabilities.  We can certainly do all things through Christ, but Christ has specific plans for us.  How many times have we talked with someone and shared how God "closed the door" on this or that ambition because He had a different purpose for our lives?  "A man's heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps." Proverbs 16:9. 

2) We can credit all our success on our brain power all day if we want, but God sees it differently.  "Everyone proud in heart is an abomination to the Lord; though they join forces, none shall go unpunished." Proverbs 16:5

I think that we set our kids up for what they believe is a deep failure on their parts when we focus their attention on their abilities, their intelligence, their interests, rather than on what God's plan for their lives is.  Kids who are raised to rely on their own smarts in making their way through life will be self-centered.  They will most likely forget that God made them for a purpose in their grief over their failures - never understanding that God may have just closed the ol' proverbial door FOR them. 

I can't say for sure how this man raised his son to think about himself or God.  He may have done and said all the right things to his son, but maybe his son was tuned into the world's way of thinking more than his father's?  We'll never know.  But we do know how we are raising our own children.  It's difficult. Even as homeschooling parents, we can get caught up in the "they sent their homeschooled kids to Harvard" stories (these days, who WANTS their kids to go there anyway?) and focus on academic and social successes.  Psalm 127:1 can serve as a great reminder of what our priorities with our children should be:
"Unless the Lord builds the house (or kid;-), they labor in vain who build it..."